Friday, January 17, 2014

Leaving the nest...

Danish was offered a place at one of the residential schools. He was happy as he managed to get a place at the school which he applied for. I was happy for him though deep in me it is quite difficult for me to let him go. He's my son. My eldest. The one who spent the longest beside me. But as I promised myself, I have to learn to let him go. He has to spread his wings like my Mum let me. Well,... Maybe my Mum is stronger.

Last night after we came back from the Surau, we talked about the offer again.

"Ibu, I am going to accept the offer."

"You sure? You don't want to wait for MRSM?"

"It's alright Ibu. I think I am going for this one."

"Ok Darling."

And he clicked the "yes" button. Appeared the links to the Offer Letter and the Offer Book.

We went through them.

"I am gonna miss you." I told him.

"I am gonna miss you too, Ibu." And he hugged me - well, our family is full of hugs and kisses. "And thank you for letting me go."

"I have too Darling. I have too." No matter how difficult it feels. At this moment I realised how true it was when someone told me "you will always have a special closeness to your eldest".

It is still another three weeks before he registered. I am not going to think about it now. I want to enjoy us being a "complete" family. I am sure to miss him knocking at my door at around 2.45 p.m. "I am home, Ibu" or receiving his calls telling me he is going to stay back to complete his work or simply to drop by at his friend's Farouk's place. Farouk was also offered a place at a residential school too but his is further away, in Hulu Terengganu. In a very short time, I will no longer received any call, "Auntie, can I speak to Danish, please?" I am going to miss them.

Looks like I have to be brave now. I know I will be a little "lost" when he left. But I know he will be alright. How could he not when he has all the prayers, blessings and love that he needs?

Happy Friday everyone and a good long weekends.

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Monday, January 13, 2014


Well, we are into the third week of January now. Time does fly. This time last year I was still in London, working my bones. And I was quite excited that after changing and re-changing my topic for my PhD application (which involved changes in topics, then changes in the problem statements), I finally completed my proposal to my satisfaction (those evaluating it may not, mind you!). It's application time now... But that's alright...

Three members of my family have their birthdays a week apart in January and February - Aqil on Jan 27, Mia on Feb 2 and their father on Feb 9. Four days back, Aqil told me that he wanted a tablet for his birthday - "a cheap one will do, Ibu". So I told him I will let his Baba knows and see what he will say. Aqil was ok with that and he went and browsed the internet for "cheapest tablet in Malaysia". "Ibu, the cheapest is RM169. Tell Baba ok?"

Well, somehow I didn't quite remember until Aqil reminded me Saturday night.

We attended our friend's son's birthday party that day in Semenyih (about 54km away from where we stay). It is more like birthday party for our children and a mini gathering for us who once lived in Dundee. There were also a family who just came back 2 weeks ago. Such, it was a merry gathering and when we left, it was already well into midnight.

I was already asleep, when I felt someone was touching my shoulder.
I reluctantly opened my eyes (part of them, that is).

"Ibu...." It's Aqil whispering.


"Have you asked Baba?" He whispered slightly louder.

I was like... Exactly?!!! "What time is it?" I managed to ask.

He left my side and came back with my mobile.

God! This is real? My son asking me if I have asked his father of his birthday gift at 2.20 in the morning?! But, what can I do? Perhaps he's still excited from the party he had just attended.

"I haven't Darling. I have forgotten. I am sorry, ok? I will ask him tomorrow."

"Ok Ibu. Thank you. I love you." He said still whispering.

Well, that was not the only time I was awakened very early in the morning. The other time, it was Hakim.

I remember that I was also very tired that night. I haven't slept for long (I think) when I heard a voice "Bu, Ibu.."


"Bu, Liverpool won against Tottenham..."

Well, that's my children for you. And last night I think I also heard him came into our room and said to me.."Liverpool won, Ibu.... against Stoke.."


Happy MaulidurRasul and Holiday :)

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